Maybe “composing” a wedding order sounds a little too formal and artificial but your wedding order should be one composed by personal reference, officiant’s experience and the expectations you both have for this incredibly important event.

The “wedding order” (please overlook this formal phrase) is a statement that the couple makes not only about their past but also about the future. The wedding is to be an authentic celebration of the couples’ love, personalities, experience and attitude. The wedding is also to be a sort of “mission statement” that the couple makes to each other, to attending guests and the wider community; this “mission statement” is not irrevocable but it maps out the ensuing journey of love and commitment.

It is generally valuable to have a structure for the wedding; the structure is not to be restrictive nor static but it provides a framework which will be clothed, adorned, completed by personal choices and therefore become an authentic, attractive and alive event.

Though most couples do not wish to make orthodox statements about faith, they do want to have a sense of the divine, the magical that has brought them together. This “divine magic” will give profound depth to the wedding and also an enhanced sense of celebration. Spirituality and fun should never be exclusive, though some church/faith communities often suggest the contrary.

 

In the hey-day of Elizabeth English, a wedding order was composed that has remained the constant in most weddings, constant in structure if not in content.

Consider –

1. An opening statement both of welcome and of explanation about the ‘miracle’ that is about to happen
2. A time for legal requirements to be met with style and elegance
3. A time for friends and family to participate in the wedding
4. A time for non-Biblical and Biblical passages to be read
5. A time to bless the couple with support both human and divine
6. A moment of triumphal declaration that the couple is declared/pronounced married to immediate guests, family and the wider community

It matters not how these component elements are arranged or expressed.

Four elements are combined in the wedding – personal, legal, social and spiritual.

1. Personal -the wedding is always an unique event and bears the stamp of the couples’ uniqueness
2. Legal – the wedding generally must meet the needs of the law
3. Social – the wedding is a bold statement to all (near and far) that “we are now married”
4. Spiritual – the “divine magic” always gives a profound dimension to the event.

I have discovered over many years, in different contexts that even the preparation  of the wedding order is an opportunity for the couple to grow in understanding of each other.

Next step? Contact me…