The link below is a conversation with The Rev. Dr. William “Bill” Kondrath, author of Facing Feelings in Faith Communities (Alban, 2013), co-editor of the Journal of Religious Leadership, and consultant and trainer with VISIONS, Inc.
The special focus of Dr. Kondrath is on the importance of accessing, articulating and accepting (my alliteration, good eh?) feelings in a faith community but I am very convinced that the same crucial importance applies to the same process in the community of people in committed relationships and of families.
Authentic and effective pre-marital conversations provide stimulus and safety for accessing our feelings; without this access, conversation can easily become conflict and chats become controversial.
Of course often one, or both, partners have had no experience, no model in their family and/or adult life to allow for feelings to be articulated however hesitantly, disjointedly and awkwardly. But to remain in this emotional status quo is a minefield of intimate explosions.
Please review the link below carefully; it is never too late to consider pre-marital or post-marital conversations. Contact me if you want to talk about possibilities.